I woke up today on the wrong side of the planet. Sometimes I get this feeling. I wake up and my mood is very unlike the day before. And it’s a scary feeling too. It reminds me that change is constant. But I need mood swings right now, I need focus. I need consistency. How should I write when I can’t even control my mood? Plus it takes a hell of a time for me to get back on track. I think it was a dream that caused it. I don’t understand my dreams anymore. Many years ago my dreams were vivid. But now, they are just poundings. I just get pounded at night. I wake up and I can’t tell the meaning of it all. All I can tell is that my head becomes fucked up. I think I’m still going to try writing. It is at these moments that writing becomes more than just a hobby and more of a need. I need to write the bad feelings away.